The Big Wave that Changed My Life

I dreamed I was about to die.

I dreamed of a Big Wave.


The dream broke over me like the voice of God, and changed my life. Twenty-five years later it still speaks to me.

About 25 years ago, I woke shaken and curious from a nightmare.

In my dream, I had taken a boat ride in a harbor on a dory, a big rowboat. There were people with me but I did not know them. There was no one else on the boat I felt responsible for, like my children. Just me, the water, and other people out enjoying a boat ride.

Suddenly we looked up to see a huge wave, a great wall of water rising out of nowhere. It towered over us, and would certainly flood our boat and destroy us all.

Death was imminent.

I was afraid but calm. I had one thought in the moment:

How do I survive this?

Do I hang on or let go?


I woke up then, with the sensation of my hands gripping the rail of the boat, the sight of that towering blue wave, and the terror of my decision with no known outcome flooding my body. My mind rang with the question.

DO I hang on, or let go?


I walked with that question for nearly a year before I could answer it. I made art about it. I drew this picture of my dream, and lived with it. I looked at the picture 1000 times before I saw the answer, right before my eyes all along.

Do I hang on or Let Go? Which did I choose?

 

Hang On or Let Go by Carla Sanders

 
 

Which do you choose?

Do you feel stuck between the choice to hang on, or let go somewhere in your life?

Most major life changes get stuck between the illusion of safety – Hang On, and the fear of change – Let Go. It is all about survival.

How do I survive this? I asked in my dream. I wonder if this is even a useful question.

Spoiler Alert: The mind (ego) survives by Hanging On. The Soul survives by Letting Go.

The Soul knows it has to allow death in order to receive more life. Your Soul is not afraid to Let Go.

When I am stuck wanting to hang on, when I know I have to let go in order to grow, and receive my desire — I look at this painting, and remember the wisdom of my dream.

Divine Feminine Astrology Reading

When the choice is as fraught and terrifying as Letting Go, it helps to have a Goddess eye-view of the situation.

The Divine Feminine Astrology Session looks at the Wisdom the Divine Feminine lined up for you at the moment of your birth.
This session opens gateways in your Soul, describing the areas of challenge, the lessons learned, and the resources that will help you make powerful decisions about life, love, mission, purpose.

The doors are now open for sessions in November. Because of the holidays and travel, there are only TWO spaces available this month.

Click the button to reserve your session:

 
Carla Sanders